Considering this blog is called A well-mannered woman I rarely discuss the literal meaning as it relates to actual manners (I think part of being well-mannered is well-rounded, cultured and living consciously). I often think about small gestures and interactions. I doubt most of us pay much attention to how we engage with someone on the street, our waitress or a sales clerk at a shop. These interactions however are quite telling about our our manners and character. Are you short tempered when your waitress doesn't respond as you would want them to? Impatient and easily angered when a cashier gives you the wrong change or takes too long to ring you up? How about when the car in front of you doesn't jump the second the light turns green? If these are moments you tend to lose your manners then you may want to rethink the way you behave. Does it feel good to get angry/hot tempered/rude easily? No sane person can answer yes to that. I've been realizing lately that there are times when I find my own impatience or expectations produce an emotional reaction that feels like a rolling boil about to push a lid off a pot. In those moments I have been consciously working to behave in a counter intuitive way and respond with patience and grace. To smile, extend kindness and to just stop for one second before acting. What a massive shift it is to change the energy of what could have been an unnecessary burst of anger or frustration and transform it into a pleasant exchange. This is what it is to be well-mannered. To push oneself toward a higher level of consciousness, to take the high road, to remember that small moments are big moments and that the way we behave affects those around us.
